PORTLY TAXI DRIVER CREATES UNIRONIC YOUTUBE CHANNEL TO HELP BODYBUILDERS MAINTAIN GAINS

By Resident Fitness Guru Arnold Gamma

With the closure of most businesses and leisure centres due to the lock down in the UK and many other countries, organisers of this year’s Bodybuilding competitions fear having contestants looking like regular people, and not the ripped Adonises that usually take part. One hopeful contender, who has admitted he wouldn’t have been ready for this year’s contests, has decided to help out those who would be involved by making videos for them, to help them maintain their physiques throughout this time. Travis Glutes has been a taxi driver for over 20 years with various companies in and around Bristol, and has always dreamed of being a champion bodybuilder. However, numerous life choices has meant that he’s piled on a fair few pounds since he first dabbled with the sport a number of years ago. But since he volunteered to self-isolate a couple of weeks ago, he felt he needed to contribute something to the sport in his spare time, so fans like him don’t have to miss out on following the competitions. I interviewed Mr Glutes in his back garden, where he’s got some large electrical appliances and other heavy household items nearby, to ask how his YouTube channel is doing, and his reaction to the negativity from some commenters.

TDJJ: “Mr Glutes, you’ve certainly been busy on your channel lately, though I note that you haven’t kept to the schedules you had set out in your first video, and this seems to be one of the reasons you’re getting so much criticism. Do you feel that your viewers have a point with the broken promises?”

TG: “I can see why some might be a bit annoyed. To be honest I weren’t aware of so many people wanting to train to strict schedules. I usually did my workouts whenever, even as late as 2am sometimes, fuck it. Although I did state that I’d be doing a live stream at nine o’clock every morning, I realised I couldn’t get it working properly on the Monday, so just filmed it normally then uploaded it later in the day. The fucking earache I got! It was as though I was charging them for it or something. I actually did consider getting paid for this, but again couldn’t work out how to do it.”

TDJJ: “I like how you talk a lot about bodyweight exercises, and using objects around the house to help whenever possible. Gives the impression that anyone can do it. But these ideas haven’t caught on with your target audience, which are competition-level bodybuilders. Why do you think this has been the case?”

TG: “I don’t have the high tech gear that they’d be used to, but neither would they because everything’s shut. So surely they’d have to adapt and start lifting up broken chest freezers and 10 year old plasma TVs like me. I’ve also made a bench from part of a broken wooden pallet and have stolen some large tractor tyres in the night to pull around the garden. Most exercises can be done with just these simple things. I’ve shown this in the videos, proper easy to follow, even for a 59-year old taxi driver like me.”

TDJJ: “I know of the videos you’re talking about, but even these have negative comments on them, as you mostly just talk about how to do them, you don’t really do the exercises yourself. Not for long, anyway.”

TG: “That’s because I’m not able to do the recommended three sets of 10 on the particular exercises. There’s a couple I can do, for three or four reps. I was able to tip over my old, burnt settee about four times. But you’ve gotta think of the pros out there, they’d be able to do stuff better. As I said on one of the videos, I’m not quite ready for any contests this year, but watch out next year! I think me just talking about the exercises is easy enough to follow, you get the idea.”

TDJJ: “What about diet information? In one of your videos, you listed all the things you regularly ate and drank. I’m no nutritionist but I’m not sure your advice is going to help those preparing for contests.”

TG: “Okay, so here’s the thing. There’s a lot of diets out there that caters for whatever results you want to get out of weight training. The people competing in these events would be taking loads of supplements as well as normal food. But the shops they get this stuff from are all closed now. I personally subscribe to what’s know as dirty bulking. You eat and drink loads, get all your healthy carbs and sugars, tons of energy and that. It’s not for everyone, but in these times you have to improvise.”

TDJJ: “Are these supplements not available online?”

TG: “Maybe. But in this time of uncertainty and desperation, who’s got time for waiting for this stuff in the post? Supermarkets might sell the basics, but nothing specific enough. It’s much easier to just get a few boxes of frozen pizza and kebab supremes from the local pantry down the road. Energy drinks as well, obviously, but don’t drink more than five in a row like I did one time. Bowels were playing up something rotten for about a week solid. Not ideal when training like a pro.”

TDJJ: “Finally, do you have any advice for anyone out there wanting to become successful on YouTube, or maybe for someone who just wants to take up bodybuilding?”

TG: “Take it slow and keep your vomiting to a minimum. That’s advice for both points really. Unless you want to do videos about being sick. Dunno, there might be a market for it. It seems there’s a market for most things nowadays.”

Published by The Daily Jabjab

Hi, I'm from Stockport, Greater Manchester England. My plan on my blog is to hone my creative writing and write a post every day this year. It sounds daunting, and I'm sure things will evolve over time. Let me know what you think about my writing - any tips, useful websites and things like that would be quite lovely. Thanks for reading!

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: