WOMAN FINALLY STOPS WATCHING FILM CONTINUOUSLY, LEARNS THAT SHE BROKE RECORD YEARS AGO

By Animated Correspondent Liu Kangaroo

An unemployed woman from Luton has finally stopped watching the 1994 Disney classic The Lion King on a continuous loop, just over 25 years since she first started. Caroline Ursine, 44, begun the marathon binge watch way back in 1995 while she was drunk, at a time when VHS was the video format of choice. She got people to get her replacement tapes, then DVDs of the film, right up to a couple of years ago when she updated to Blu Ray, in order to continue this record breaking feat. Miss Ursine admits she stopped counting the amount of copies of the film she wore out when she reached one thousand, and the TVs she watched the film on were also upgraded as time went on. But despite this amazing achievement, she’s had to make a few sacrifices along the way, and warned anyone out there who might be influenced by her endurance, that it might not be worth the amount of heartbreak she’s suffered throughout. I interviewed Miss Ursine at her flat, which she’s slowly getting round to dusting after all this time.

TDJJ: “Miss Ursine, just want to congratulate you on breaking this record. What made you start on this quest, and when did you know you had broken it?”

CU: “I actually didn’t start watching the film to break the record, I was getting drunk with a few friends at my house one night and I usually get emotional and cry after a few bottles. When the Circle of Life song came on, I bawled my eyes out and just got into it, putting the film on again and again. I only recently found out that the record for watching the Lion King over and over was previously held by some kid in Ohio, which was six times in a row, just under 9 hours. So yeah, I smashed it.”

TDJJ: “How did you adapt your sleeping pattern and day to day life during this time? What parameters did you set yourself?”

CU: “Well, the general consensus dictates that, in order to watch the film, and not to just have it playing in the background, is to keep at least 95% of eye contact on the screen during the film’s running time. I taught myself to have micro sleeps at half hour intervals. It sounds like a lot of trouble, but you get used to it. I also quickly realised that I had to get a second video player, TV and VHS copy set up, so I could truly watch it without waiting for the film to rewind when it finished. At the time I started I worked full time at a discount store around the corner. They were very understanding and even installed a till and some shelves of toiletries in the living room so I could still do my job. But over time, this set up put a strain on my private life, and my choice to continue watching the film started to alienate friends and family.”

TDJJ: “I can only imagine the difficulties for all concerned. But despite all this, you still managed to give birth three times and get married and divorced twice. That’s quite an eventful life for people who haven’t been watching The Lion King for over half their existence.”

CU: “Thanks. But I’d still warn people over doing this themselves. I’m the first to admit that my attention towards my ex husbands wasn’t exactly the best. It got easier when I was given some portable DVD players for Christmas one year, so I could leave the house, but I could tell Chas and Chaka didn’t enjoy their respective honeymoons that much. But I’m sure, if they look back at my determination during these difficult times, they’d be happy for me now that I’ve annihilated the previous record.”

TDJJ: “You also lost your job during this marathon binge watch, and your kids were taken away due to negligence. Was there any point in which you doubted yourself, that your sacrifices were getting too much and thought about ending this epic feat before you finally did, for the greater good?”

CU: “Yes, there were times when I could tell that my lifestyle choice was getting in the way of everything else, but I couldn’t allow myself to dwell on things too much, because of the whole 95% eye contact on the screen rule that I mentioned earlier. Yes, my kids were taken off me, the marriages broke down and I was fired for taking from the till. But I’m a local celebrity because of this, and men like the idea of banging famous women, so I had no shortage of people willing to go out and getting me more TVs, DVD players and copies of the film, so I could continue my marathon run. So it’s swings and roundabouts, really.”

TDJJ: “I read the reason that you finally stopped was because you wanted to watch the recent remake. What did you think of the new version?”

CU: “I couldn’t go to see it at the cinema, I was thrown out even though I explained the reason I had to keep watching the original. So I had to wait for it to come out on Blu Ray. To be honest, I put off watching it as a few people told me that it wasn’t as good. I did like the new graphics, but no, I much prefer the cartoon one.”

TDJJ: “There’s a story about a woman in Romford planning a similar record attempt for watching Notting Hill back to back. The record for that film stands at just over three days. What advice would you give to her?”

CU: “If she feels she must do this, I’d tell her to start watching it in the kitchen so you always have food and drink close by, and keep shopping bags within reach for hygiene reasons. When you’ve gotta go, you’ve gotta go. Nipping to the actual toilet is out of the question.”

Published by The Daily Jabjab

Hi, I'm from Stockport, Greater Manchester England. My plan on my blog is to hone my creative writing and write a post every day this year. It sounds daunting, and I'm sure things will evolve over time. Let me know what you think about my writing - any tips, useful websites and things like that would be quite lovely. Thanks for reading!

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