[I originally uploaded this story on 04/01/20, putting it on a separate page so it’s more visible or something. Dunno.]

Exciting news for a small village in Stocktown, as Warner Bros have decided to use it as the location for the new Mad Max film. Skaggneton, which comprises of a small shopping centre, rickety houses and a general relaxed attitude towards hygiene, has been seen as the ideal choice, saving the studio millions on the budget. Producer of the film, Chuck Sweetchuck III, looked very pleased with himself when asked about his decision. TDJJ sat down with him in his makeshift office in a discarded shoe shop.

“Yeah man, this tiny village was exactly what we were looking for. I was sure surprised that there was still a place like this in a developed country. I reckon we’d just need to put, like, a couple bags of sand on the roads, and we got ourselves a movie, god damn it!”

TDJJ asked him how many other places did they scout before deciding on Skaggneton, and was there a particular deal breaker that set this place apart from the others?

“We looked at some parts of Texas, Arkansas and Philly, but nothing spoke to me as much as this place. I just love the mixture of discount shops and violent drinking holes. I even saw an advert for Borat on one of the phone booths. I mean, that came out in, like, 2006? What sealed the deal was when we were sitting in one of the poorly-lit bars admiring the lack of interior decorating, when we were approached by some quirky folk who could tell straight away we were outsiders as we had suits on. We’d already been subjected to some authentic Brit aggression when I asked if they served food earlier on. One of our party was glassed and had to be hospitalised, while another suffered minor eye injuries when initially refusing to hand over some notes. I actually ended up almost naked as one of the gang took my suit with the intention of selling it to a nearby vagrant. I got caught up in the spirit of things and offered them all parts in the film. Telling them that we were in town to make the next Mad Max film seemed to make them even more willing to get into character, portraying a dystopian future world where people fight for survival and business suits. I could’ve cried right there!”

While speaking with Chuck, you could tell he had fallen in love with the place. TDJJ gave him a brief history of the village, how council funding has virtually dried up in the last 15 years or so.

“And it shows! I’m kicking myself that we didn’t use the village for Fury Road. Closing the deal with the mayor was awesome! This will be a good time for Skeegotron!”

After the interview TDJJ caught up with the controversial mayor of Stocktown, Laramie Chuckie-Egg, to get his insight into the prospect of rubbing shoulders with Tinseltown. He is equally excited with the deal, but had some words of caution.

“I’ve been mayor for over 14 years, and in that time I’ve never invested any money in Skaggneton. Mainly because my ex lives there. If she and her new kid thinks she’s getting any of this Hollywood cash, she can bloody whistle. I’m getting myself a better car. Instead of continually sending me animal shit through the post, the locals in Skaggneton should redirect their frustration at her. She ended it with me. I’m not being selfish!”

Mad Max: Hail to The Jovial Farmer is out later this year.

Published by The Daily Jabjab

Hi, I'm from Stockport, Greater Manchester England. My plan on my blog is to hone my creative writing and write a post every day this year. It sounds daunting, and I'm sure things will evolve over time. Let me know what you think about my writing - any tips, useful websites and things like that would be quite lovely. Thanks for reading!

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